This portfolio has only about 1.4 years of historical data, based on the youngest asset in the portfolio. Some metrics, projections, and AI insights may be less reliable and should be interpreted with caution.
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A portfolio that thinks diversification means betting big on Bitcoin and the S&P 500

Report created on Jun 11, 2025

Risk profile Info

5/7
Growth
Less risk More risk

Diversification profile Info

5/5
Highly Diversified
Less diversification More diversification

Positions

At first glance, calling this portfolio "highly diversified" feels like calling a diet of pizza and ice cream "balanced" because you sprinkled some greens on top. With half your wealth in the Vanguard S&P 500 ETF and another quarter in the Fidelity Wise Origin Bitcoin Trust, this portfolio is less a model of diversification and more a high-stakes bet on the market's most popular assets. The attempt to balance things out with the Vanguard Total International Stock Index Fund ETF Shares is commendable, but it's like bringing a water pistol to a wildfire.

Growth Info

With a CAGR of 32.73%, this portfolio's historical performance might make you feel like a Wall Street wizard. But remember, past performance is like relying on last year's weather forecast to plan today's picnic. This performance is heavily skewed by the recent bull run in tech stocks and Bitcoin's rollercoaster ride. And those 12 days that make up 90% of the returns? That's not investing; that's playing financial Russian roulette.

Projection Info

Monte Carlo simulations are fancy ways to play "what if" with your money, and in this case, they're showing a range of outcomes wider than the Grand Canyon. Sure, the potential for a 9,487.3% median return sounds like you'll be lighting cigars with hundred-dollar bills. But let's not forget, Monte Carlo also rolls the dice on scenarios where you're left holding the bag. Betting big on Bitcoin and the S&P 500 could either buy you a yacht or a lesson in humility.

Asset classes Info

  • Stocks
    74%
  • Other
    25%
  • Cash
    1%

Let's talk about your "asset classes." Stocks and... other? That's like saying your diet consists of food and non-food items. The 74% in stocks is understandable for a growth profile, but lumping 25% into Bitcoin under "other" is like saying mystery meat is a food group. And that lonely 1% in cash? It's like keeping a fire extinguisher in a fireworks factory—probably not enough to make a difference when things get hot.

Sectors Info

  • Technology
    19%
  • Financials
    13%
  • Consumer Discretionary
    8%
  • Industrials
    8%
  • Health Care
    8%
  • Telecommunications
    6%
  • Consumer Staples
    5%
  • Energy
    3%
  • Basic Materials
    3%
  • Utilities
    2%
  • Real Estate
    2%

Your sector spread is like a buffet where the main dish is technology, financial services, and a side of everything else. With 19% in technology, you're riding the Silicon Valley rollercoaster, hoping it's more up than down. The financial services slice is less thrilling but necessary, like the broccoli of your investment plate. And the smattering across other sectors? That's just garnish on a dish that's already quite rich.

Regions Info

  • North America
    52%
  • Europe Developed
    10%
  • Asia Emerging
    4%
  • Japan
    4%
  • Asia Developed
    2%
  • Australasia
    1%
  • Africa/Middle East
    1%
  • Latin America
    1%

Geographically, this portfolio screams "America First" with a whisper of international exposure. With over half your assets in North America, it's clear you're bullish on the US. The international ETF tries to bring some global flavor to the party, but with Europe and Asia barely making a dent, it's like bringing a single international guest to an all-American barbecue.

Market capitalization Info

  • Mega-cap
    35%
  • Large-cap
    25%
  • Mid-cap
    13%
  • Small-cap
    1%

Your market cap allocation shows a penchant for the big boys, with a heavy lean on mega and big caps. It's like preferring blockbuster movies over indie films; safer bets, but you might miss out on some hidden gems. Small and micro caps are almost non-existent, suggesting you're not much for gambling on the little guys. It's a conservative stance in a portfolio that's otherwise flirting with volatility.

Risk vs. return

This chart shows the Efficient Frontier, calculated using your current assets with different allocation combinations. It highlights the best balance between risk and return based on historical data. "Efficient" portfolios maximize returns for a given risk or minimize risk for a given return. Portfolios below the curve are less efficient. This is informational and not a recommendation to buy or sell any assets.

Click on the colored dots to explore allocations.

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Efficient Frontier? More like the Wild West. This portfolio's idea of risk vs. return optimization seems to hinge on high growth potential with a side of nerve-wracking volatility. It's like trying to balance on a tightrope while juggling flaming torches. High risk, high reward, but you might want to have a safety net.

Dividends Info

  • Vanguard S&P 500 ETF 1.30%
  • Vanguard Total International Stock Index Fund ETF Shares 2.90%
  • Weighted yield (per year) 1.38%

Your dividends are the portfolio's attempt at generating some pocket change, but let's be real, 1.38% isn't going to fund a retirement. It's like finding spare change in the couch cushions; nice to have, but you're not buying a Ferrari with it.

Ongoing product costs Info

  • Vanguard S&P 500 ETF 0.03%
  • Vanguard Total International Stock Index Fund ETF Shares 0.05%
  • Weighted costs total (per year) 0.03%

At least you're not bleeding money on costs. With TERs lower than a limbo stick at a beach party, you're keeping more of your returns. It's a small victory in a portfolio that's otherwise playing fast and loose with risk.

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