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A portfolio that thinks diversity means choosing between stocks, gold, and Bitcoin

Report created on May 7, 2025

Risk profile Info

4/7
Balanced
Less risk More risk

Diversification profile Info

1/5
Single-Focused
Less diversification More diversification

Positions

At first glance, this portfolio screams, "I love dividends, but I also live on the edge with Bitcoin." Holding 75% in a dividend-focused ETF might make you feel like a cautious retiree, while the 13% in a Bitcoin ETF screams mid-life crisis. The token gesture towards the S&P 500 and a sprinkle of gold is like remembering to eat a vegetable after a diet of steak and energy drinks. It's an odd mix that seems to confuse "diversified" with "having a bit of everything."

Growth Info

With a CAGR of 7.55%, this portfolio's performance is like running a marathon with weights tied to your ankles. It's not the worst, but it's far from optimizing your sweat. The max drawdown of -21.45% is a stark reminder of the volatility you're signing up for, especially with Bitcoin's wild ride. It's akin to enjoying a rollercoaster but forgetting you're afraid of heights until you're strapped in and climbing.

Projection Info

Monte Carlo simulations are the fortune cookies of the investing world — take them with a grain of salt but don't ignore the advice. Your portfolio's future looks like a theme park map: some thrilling highs, terrifying drops, and a lot of meandering in between. A 50th percentile outcome of 231.2% is tantalizing, but the potential 5th percentile loss of -53.5% should have you questioning if the ride is worth the ticket price.

Asset classes Info

  • Stocks
    85%
  • Other
    8%
  • Cash
    7%

With 85% in stocks and a curious 8% in "other" (read: Bitcoin), this portfolio is like a diet consisting mostly of meat with a side of mystery ingredients. The 7% in cash is like keeping an emergency exit, but it's unclear if it's strategic or just forgotten change under the couch cushions. This asset class mix is less a balanced meal and more a testament to a love affair with high stakes and shiny objects.

Sectors Info

  • Consumer Staples
    16%
  • Energy
    15%
  • Health Care
    12%
  • Technology
    10%
  • Industrials
    9%
  • Consumer Discretionary
    8%
  • Financials
    8%
  • Telecommunications
    5%
  • Basic Materials
    1%

Sector allocation is like deciding you only need four food groups and ignoring the rest. Heavy on consumer defensive and energy but ignoring real estate and utilities is like packing for a trip but only bringing swim trunks and a parka. It's an unbalanced approach that might leave you cold (or overheated) when the economic weather changes.

Regions Info

  • North America
    84%

This portfolio's 84% allocation to North America is like planning a world tour but only visiting Canada and the U.S. It's safe and familiar, yes, but ignores the rich experiences and potential gains from venturing into Europe, Asia, or emerging markets. Global diversification isn't just a buzzword; it's the difference between a well-rounded journey and a staycation.

Market capitalization Info

  • Large-cap
    44%
  • Mid-cap
    25%
  • Mega-cap
    10%
  • Small-cap
    4%
  • Micro-cap
    1%

The market cap spread in this portfolio is like having a friend group that consists of one wealthy mogul, a few middle-class buddies, and a couple of aspiring artists. Sure, it's diverse, but the heavy lean towards big and medium caps suggests a fear of the small and micro, which can sometimes be the life of the party (or the portfolio).

Risk vs. return

This chart shows the Efficient Frontier, calculated using your current assets with different allocation combinations. It highlights the best balance between risk and return based on historical data. "Efficient" portfolios maximize returns for a given risk or minimize risk for a given return. Portfolios below the curve are less efficient. This is informational and not a recommendation to buy or sell any assets.

Click on the colored dots to explore allocations.

The current setup is like insisting on using a map when you have GPS — it'll get you there, but not as efficiently as possible. An 18.71% expected return at the same risk level is the portfolio equivalent of upgrading from economy to first class for free. Ignoring this is like saying, "No thanks, I prefer less legroom."

Dividends Info

  • ProShares Bitcoin Strategy ETF 63.30%
  • Schwab U.S. Dividend Equity ETF 4.10%
  • SPDR® Portfolio S&P 500 ETF 1.40%
  • Weighted yield (per year) 11.44%

Leaning heavily on dividends from the Schwab ETF is like counting on a steady paycheck from a job that's not as secure as you think. It's comforting until the market shifts. And while the Bitcoin ETF's dividend yield might look like a typo at 63.30%, it's a reminder that high returns often come with high risks, like betting on a horse because it has the prettiest name.

Ongoing product costs Info

  • ProShares Bitcoin Strategy ETF 0.95%
  • Schwab U.S. Dividend Equity ETF 0.06%
  • abrdn Physical Gold Shares ETF 0.17%
  • SPDR® Portfolio S&P 500 ETF 0.02%
  • Weighted costs total (per year) 0.17%

Costs in this portfolio are a mixed bag. On one hand, you've got the Schwab and SPDR ETFs costing you pennies on the dollar. On the other, the Bitcoin ETF is like ordering a fancy cocktail that costs as much as your meal. At a total TER of 0.17%, it's not the worst, but paying nearly 1% for the thrill of Bitcoin is like tipping for a meal you're not sure you'll enjoy.

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