Roast mode 🔥

Closet indexer with a secret tech crush pretending to be a chill balanced portfolio

Report created on Apr 8, 2026

Risk profile

  • Secure
    Speculative

The risk profile, derived from past market volatility, reflects the level of risk the portfolio is exposed to. This assessment helps align your investments with your financial goals and comfort with market fluctuations.

Diversification profile

  • Focused
    Diversified

The diversification assessment evaluates the spread of investments across asset classes, regions, and sectors. This ensures a balanced mix, reducing risk and maximizing returns by not concentrating in any single area.

Positions

This thing looks diversified at first glance, then you realize it’s basically “world stocks plus shiny toys.” Half of it is plain-vanilla global equity (S&P 500 + developed + emerging), then you bolt on gold, a pure energy fund, the NASDAQ 100, and a concentrated semiconductor ETF for vibes. It’s like you built a sensible Toyota and then duct-taped a turbo and a spoiler on top. Structurally, it’s not insane, but it definitely can’t decide whether it wants to be boringly diversified or a growth-chasing side quest. Takeaway: if the goal is balance, the add-ons are louder than they look on the page.

Growth Info

Historically, this portfolio has been flexing pretty hard: 17.26% CAGR versus about 13.8% for the US market and 11.9% globally. CAGR (Compound Annual Growth Rate) is basically your average speed over the trip, and you’ve been flooring it. Max drawdown at -20% was actually *less* painful than the benchmarks’ -24% to -26%, so you got more return with slightly less max pain. Just remember: this track record is from a tech-and-US-heavy bull phase with some monster semiconductor and mega-cap runs. Past data is yesterday’s weather — helpful, but it doesn’t swear an oath to repeat.

Projection Info

The Monte Carlo simulation throws your portfolio into 1,000 alternate futures and asks, “How often does this blow up?” Median outcome: $1,000 becomes about $2,738 in 15 years, with a wide “likely” range from about $1,873 to $4,064. Monte Carlo is just a fancy way of saying “we rolled the dice a lot but still can’t see the future.” You’ve got a 76% chance of ending with more money than you started, which is nice, but the possible outcomes from about $1,072 to $6,735 show the real story: equity risk is a roller coaster, not a bus route.

Asset classes Info

  • Stocks
    90%
  • Other
    10%

Asset-class split is 90% stocks and 10% “Other,” which is basically gold trying its best to be your adult supervision. Calling this “Balanced” is generous — it’s basically an equity portfolio with a golden comfort blanket. No bonds, no real defensive ballast, just one shiny rock to emotionally offset the equity swings. In a real equity crash, gold *might* help, or it might just do its own weird thing. Asset classes are your main knobs for dialing risk; here, the risk knob is turned up and taped in place, with gold as a small “I tried” sticker.

Sectors Info

  • Technology
    27%
  • Energy
    13%
  • Financials
    12%
  • Industrials
    8%
  • Consumer Discretionary
    7%
  • Telecommunications
    6%
  • Health Care
    6%
  • Consumer Staples
    4%
  • Basic Materials
    4%
  • Utilities
    2%
  • Real Estate
    1%

This breakdown covers the equity portion of your portfolio only.

Sector spread looks “diversified” until you notice the 27% tech chunk plus a 13% energy spike and then everything else trailing behind. Tech + semis + NASDAQ exposure means you’re basically a growth junkie dressed in broad-market clothing. Energy at 13% adds a nice dose of cyclic whiplash — it tends to party late and leave early. Sector tilts matter because they decide *which* economic stories hit you hardest. This setup will love innovation booms and commodity spikes but sulk during rate-driven tech selloffs or when the world decides it cares about boring, steady sectors again.

Regions Info

  • North America
    51%
  • Europe Developed
    13%
  • Asia Developed
    9%
  • Asia Emerging
    6%
  • Japan
    5%
  • Africa/Middle East
    2%
  • Australasia
    2%
  • Latin America
    1%

This breakdown covers the equity portion of your portfolio only.

Geographically, you’ve gone with the classic: “World portfolio that still thinks in dollars.” About 51% in North America, then relatively sensible slices across Europe, Japan, developed Asia, and a small bit of emerging regions. For once, the global split doesn’t scream “America or nothing,” which is surprisingly rational. That said, you’re still anchored to developed markets with only modest exposure to places that might actually drive future growth. Geography isn’t just flags on a map — it’s different economies, currencies, and political circus acts. Here, the design is globally aware, but still comfort-zone heavy.

Market capitalization Info

  • Mega-cap
    40%
  • Large-cap
    30%
  • Mid-cap
    16%
  • No data
    10%
  • Small-cap
    2%

This breakdown covers the equity portion of your portfolio only.

Market cap tilt is exactly what you’d expect from big ETFs: 40% mega-cap, 30% large-cap, 16% mid, and a token 2% small. Translation: you’re letting the giants run the show while pretending the smaller companies are invited to the party. This is basically a “buy the winners of the last decade” setup. When mega-caps keep winning, that feels genius; when leadership rotates to smaller or more beaten-up names, this portfolio moves like a cruise ship in a go-kart race. Nothing wrong with a cap-weighted tilt — just don’t confuse this with “owning everything evenly.”

True holdings Info

  • NVIDIA Corporation
    3.96%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF
    • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust
    • VanEck Semiconductor ETF
  • Exxon Mobil Corp
    2.32%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Energy Select Sector SPDR® Fund
  • Apple Inc
    2.23%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF
    • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust
  • Taiwan Semiconductor Manufacturing Co. Ltd.
    1.73%
    Part of fund(s):
    • iShares Core MSCI Emerging Markets ETF
  • Chevron Corp
    1.72%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Energy Select Sector SPDR® Fund
  • Microsoft Corporation
    1.64%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF
    • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust
  • Broadcom Inc
    1.44%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF
    • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust
    • VanEck Semiconductor ETF
  • Amazon.com Inc
    1.24%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF
    • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust
  • Alphabet Inc Class A
    0.99%
    Part of fund(s):
    • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF
    • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust
  • Taiwan Semiconductor Manufacturing
    0.87%
    Part of fund(s):
    • VanEck Semiconductor ETF
  • Top 10 total 18.15%

Look-through holdings show the usual suspects running the show: NVIDIA, Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, Alphabet, plus the big oil twins and TSMC. And that’s only from top-10 ETF data, so the real overlap is definitely chunkier. You’ve basically hired multiple managers to buy you the exact same mega-caps, then pretended it’s diversification. When NVIDIA shows up via S&P 500, NASDAQ 100, and the semiconductor ETF, that’s not three ideas — that’s one idea in a trench coat. Hidden concentration like this means when the big names sneeze, your “diversified” portfolio catches a full-body flu.

Factors Info

Value
Preference for undervalued stocks
Neutral
Data availability: 80%
Size
Exposure to smaller companies
Neutral
Data availability: 100%
Momentum
Exposure to recently outperforming stocks
Neutral
Data availability: 80%
Quality
Preference for financially healthy companies
Neutral
Data availability: 80%
Yield
Preference for dividend-paying stocks
Neutral
Data availability: 100%
Low Volatility
Preference for stable, lower-risk stocks
Neutral
Data availability: 100%

Factor exposures are estimated using statistical models based on historical data and measure systematic (market-relative) tilts, not absolute portfolio characteristics. Results may vary depending on the analysis period, data availability, and currency of the underlying assets.

Factor-wise, you somehow managed to land perfectly neutral on everything: value, size, momentum, quality, yield, and low volatility all hovering around “meh, market-like.” Factor exposure is the ingredient list behind your returns — things like buying cheap (value), fast movers (momentum), or stable stuff (low volatility). Here, you’ve basically picked the entire menu and told the chef to “just make whatever the average person eats.” The upside: no accidental crazy bet on one style. The downside: you’re not intentionally harnessing any factor that tends to pay off over time — you’re just riding the market’s mood swings.

Risk contribution Info

  • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust
    Weight: 25.00%
    24.9%
  • Vanguard FTSE Developed Markets Index Fund ETF Shares
    Weight: 25.00%
    23.8%
  • iShares Core MSCI Emerging Markets ETF
    Weight: 15.00%
    14.7%
  • VanEck Semiconductor ETF
    Weight: 7.50%
    13.8%
  • Energy Select Sector SPDR® Fund
    Weight: 10.00%
    9.8%
  • Top 5 risk contribution 87.0%

Risk contribution reveals who’s actually shaking the portfolio, not just who’s taking up space. Your top three positions by weight — S&P 500, developed markets, and emerging — are a totally reasonable 63% of overall risk. No hidden monster there. But the 7.5% semiconductor ETF pulling almost 13.8% of risk is the loud cousin at the family dinner. That risk/weight ratio of 1.84 says it’s punching above its size. Trimming outsized risk hogs doesn’t mean you hate them; it just keeps one spicy bet from deciding your entire year because some chip cycle turned south overnight.

Risk vs. return

This chart shows the Efficient Frontier, calculated using your current assets with different allocation combinations. It highlights the best balance between risk and return based on historical data. "Efficient" portfolios maximize returns for a given risk or minimize risk for a given return. Portfolios below the curve are less efficient. This is informational and not a recommendation to buy or sell any assets.

Click on the colored dots to explore allocations.

The efficient frontier chart is where the roast really lands. Same ingredients, different recipe: you’re sitting at a Sharpe ratio of 0.81 while the optimal mix of *your own holdings* could hit 1.5 with only a bit more risk. Sharpe ratio is “return per unit of pain,” and right now you’re queueing for the long ride and then sitting in the middle row instead of the front. You’re also a full 7.79 percentage points below the efficient frontier at your risk level, which is portfolio-speak for “you’re working harder than you need to for these returns.”

Dividends Info

  • iShares Core MSCI Emerging Markets ETF 2.60%
  • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF 0.50%
  • VanEck Semiconductor ETF 0.30%
  • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust 0.80%
  • Vanguard FTSE Developed Markets Index Fund ETF Shares 2.90%
  • Energy Select Sector SPDR® Fund 2.50%
  • Weighted yield (per year) 1.62%

Yield at 1.62% is pocket change — this portfolio is clearly here for capital gains, not income. You’ve got a couple of decent yield contributors in emerging and developed ex-US, plus energy doing its dividend thing, but then NASDAQ and semis show up with yields so low they may as well just send you a Christmas card. Dividends aren’t magic, but they do help smooth the ride and give you some return even when markets go sideways. Here, the message is obvious: if you want income, look elsewhere; this setup is more growth-chaser than paycheck generator.

Ongoing product costs Info

  • SPDR® Gold Shares 0.40%
  • iShares Core MSCI Emerging Markets ETF 0.09%
  • Invesco NASDAQ 100 ETF 0.15%
  • VanEck Semiconductor ETF 0.35%
  • SPDR S&P 500 ETF Trust 0.10%
  • Vanguard FTSE Developed Markets Index Fund ETF Shares 0.05%
  • Energy Select Sector SPDR® Fund 0.09%
  • Weighted costs total (per year) 0.14%

Total TER at 0.14% is impressively low — you’ve basically built a global equity portfolio for the cost of a cheap coffee each year per $1,000. Most of the core funds are dirt cheap; even the “spicy” ones like semis and gold are tolerable. Fees are the silent thieves that never have a bad year, so keeping them this low is one of the least stupid things in this whole build. Dry compliment: you either actually paid attention to expense ratios, or you got lucky clicking the right tickers, but either way, your wallet approves.

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